Robyn on Purpose
Discover Your True Purpose
Living on Purpose
Purpose isn't found in changing circumstances.
It's found in the way you participate in the life you already have.
It's easy to move through life as though your circumstances determine your experience of it.
A good day gives you something to feel good about. A difficult day puts you in a bad mood. When work is going well, you're engaged. When it isn't, frustration takes over. When the people around you are positive, it's easier to be positive. When they're not, their mood can quickly become yours.
Without realizing it, you can begin responding to whatever the day gives you — allowing circumstances to determine where your attention goes, how you feel, and ultimately, how you show up.
Your circumstances matter. They affect you. They can make life easier, harder, richer, more demanding, more enjoyable, or more painful. But they don't have to determine your entire experience of the day.
You can change the way you relate to what's in front of you.
You can change what you pay attention to. You can recognize meaning that familiarity has pushed into the background. You can decide how you want to show up. You can become more intentional about what you contribute to the people and places around you.
Living on purpose is choosing to participate in the experience of your life rather than allowing circumstance alone to determine it.
Direct Your Attention
Routine has a way of making meaningful things feel ordinary.
The work that once challenged or excited you becomes just another task.
The home you dreamed of owning becomes the place that needs cleaning.
The people you love become another responsibility competing for your attention.
The life you worked so hard to build becomes the life you barely notice.
Sometimes there is meaning in your life that has become difficult to see. Sometimes your attention has become so fixed on what's frustrating, disappointing, unfinished, or missing that very little else is getting through.
And sometimes, when you look honestly, you may realize there simply isn't enough in your life right now that feels meaningful to you.
Before deciding which is true, look more closely.
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What have you begun taking for granted?
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Who quietly benefits from what you do each day?
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Who quietly makes your life better every day?
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What strengths do you use so naturally that you rarely recognize them?
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What parts of your life have become so familiar that you've stopped appreciating them?
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What once felt exciting but now simply feels expected?
You may find that there is more meaning here than you realized. You may recognize the value of something you've stopped appreciating, or see your own contribution differently.
Or you may look honestly and realize that very little in your life feels meaningful right now.
Directing your attention isn't about searching harder until you can convince yourself that what you have should be enough. Sometimes looking more closely helps you appreciate what is already there.
Sometimes it shows you what is missing.
If the weight of responsibility is making it difficult to experience the meaningful parts of your life, explore what you're carrying, what belongs to you, and where things may need to change.
Create Meaning
Meaning doesn't have to already exist in a circumstance for you to experience it there.
Sometimes it comes from deciding what you want your participation to contribute.
Think about two people with the same job. They may work the same hours, carry the same responsibilities, and complete the same tasks. Yet their experience of that work can be very different.
One nurse begins their shift thinking about getting through the next twelve hours. Another begins the same shift thinking about how they can make the people in their care feel safe, respected, and seen.
One teacher walks into the classroom focused on what needs to be covered that day. Another walks in thinking about how they can help their students feel capable, curious, and excited to learn.
One manager arrives at work thinking about the problems that need solving and the results they need to achieve. Another arrives thinking about how they can create an environment where people feel valued, supported, and proud of what they contribute.
The second person isn't doing different work. They've decided what they want their work to mean through the way they participate in it.
You can do the same wherever you already spend your time.
Maybe you want to be the person who makes people feel welcome. Who brings humour into a difficult environment. Who notices when someone needs encouragement. Who makes things easier. Who asks better questions. Who helps other people grow. Who brings people together. Who improves the way something is done.
The question becomes less about “What meaning does this give me?” and more about:
“What meaning can I create here?”
What could be different because you were part of it?
How could someone benefit from the way you show up?
What could you contribute that would make being there matter more to you?
You don't need to feel inspired by every part of your life to find something within it worth investing yourself in. Sometimes meaning comes from the circumstance itself. Sometimes it comes from what you decide to do with your place in it.
Create Opportunities to Contribute
Living on purpose isn't only about making the life you have feel more meaningful. The way you participate in your life also teaches you about yourself.
You discover what engages you by engaging.
You discover what matters to you by investing yourself in things and seeing what happens.
You discover strengths you may not have known you had by finding opportunities to use them.
And you discover what you want more of by experiencing enough of it to recognize, I want more of this in my life.
That's why participation is especially important when you're trying to find direction.
You can imagine what might fulfil you. You can think about what you're good at, what you care about, or what kind of work might suit you. But there are things you can only learn about yourself by getting involved.
At Work
Work can provide more opportunities to do that than your job description might suggest.
It's easy to decide where your contribution ends based on what you're officially responsible for.
That's not my job.
I'm not the manager.
That's above my pay grade.
I don't get paid for that.
Sometimes those are completely appropriate boundaries. You don't need to take responsibility for everything simply because you are capable of doing it.
But sometimes those beliefs keep you from stepping into something you would actually find meaningful.
You might discover that you love teaching because you volunteered to train someone.
You might discover that you enjoy leading because you took responsibility for a project and found that you liked bringing people together around a common goal.
You might realize how much you enjoy solving problems because you stopped accepting an inefficient process and came up with a better one.
You might discover that developing people matters deeply to you because you took an interest in helping someone grow.
It's easy to think that by refusing to contribute beyond what is required, you're withholding something from your employer. But you may also be limiting your own experience of your work.
Taking initiative on something that interests you, helping someone develop, solving a problem that has been frustrating you, sharing an idea, or finding a better way of doing something can make your work more engaging and enjoyable. It gives you opportunities to use strengths and parts of yourself that your basic responsibilities may never ask for.
This doesn't mean taking on work that should belong to someone else, continually doing more than you're being compensated for, or allowing an employer to take advantage of your willingness to contribute.
It means recognizing that “I don't get paid for that” can sometimes cost you something too.
You may be opting out of the very experiences that would make your work more interesting, help you develop, or show you something about what you want more of in your life.
And what you learn may eventually point somewhere else.
You may realize you want a leadership role. A different kind of work. More autonomy. More creativity. More interaction with people. A career built around something you've only had small opportunities to experience.
Or you may realize that work simply isn't where you need to find that kind of meaning.
Wherever that realization leads, it doesn't change the fact that you are here now.
You may stay in this work for another month, another year, or the rest of your career. You may already know you want something different. You may have practical reasons that make leaving impossible right now.
But if you're going to be here, how do you want to be here?
It's easy to respond to an environment that disappoints you by withdrawing from it. You stop offering ideas. You stop looking for ways to improve things. You stop using strengths no one explicitly asked you to use. You do what's required and save the rest of yourself for somewhere else.
But the person who experiences the greatest consequence of that attitude all day long is you.
Your work becomes less engaging. Your days become something to endure. You have fewer opportunities to feel challenged, useful, creative, connected, or proud of what you've contributed.
Choosing to remain engaged doesn't mean the environment is right for you. It doesn't mean giving more than is healthy, accepting treatment you shouldn't, or abandoning appropriate boundaries.
It means recognizing that these are still your hours.
This is still your day.
This is still part of your life.
You can want something different and still choose to participate fully while you're here.
Deciding that a job isn't fulfilling doesn't require you to become disengaged from it. Recognizing its limitations doesn't mean you have to spend your days focused on them. And knowing you eventually want something different doesn't mean you have to mentally leave before you physically do.
You can still look for ways to make the day more interesting. You can still care about the people around you. You can still solve problems, share ideas, learn something, improve something, bring humour, encourage someone, or take pride in what you contribute.
None of that means you've decided to stay.
It means you've decided not to put your own engagement with your life on hold while you're there.
Outside of Work
Not every job will give you room to contribute in ways that matter to you.
You may have very little control over what you do. Your role may genuinely be limited. Or you may simply have work that provides income without providing much meaning.
That doesn't mean your entire life has to feel the same way.
You can create opportunities elsewhere to teach, build, mentor, volunteer, create, organize, care, advocate, solve, lead, or contribute to something you care about.
And again, participation gives you information.
Something you begin outside of work may remain a meaningful part of your personal life. It may grow into something larger. It may eventually influence the work you choose. Or you may try it and discover it isn't nearly as fulfilling as you imagined. Even discovering that something isn't right for you can help lead you toward where you're meant to go.
When Change Becomes Necessary
When life doesn't feel meaningful, changing your circumstances can seem like the obvious answer.
A different job. A new role. A new workplace. A different community. Something that feels more interesting, important, or aligned with who you are.
And sometimes a change really is needed.
But a new environment can also create a temporary sense of meaning simply because you relate to it differently at first.
You pay attention because it's new. You engage because you're learning. You meet people with curiosity. You look for opportunities. You bring energy and ideas. You haven't yet become accustomed to everything around you.
Then, eventually, the new becomes familiar.
If you rely on your circumstances to create meaning for you, you may find yourself searching again.
This doesn't mean you should stay somewhere that isn't right for you. It means that before assuming meaning exists somewhere else, it's worth asking how much of the experience you're looking for depends on how you participate once you get there.
A different environment can give you new opportunities.
But you are still the person who has to engage with them.
At the same time, how you participate isn't the only thing that matters.
Sometimes you've done what you can with where you are. You've changed your focus. You've looked for opportunities to contribute. You've tried showing up differently. And instead of discovering more meaning, you've gained clarity about what the environment doesn't allow.
When Change Is Necessary
Some environments make it difficult to use the parts of yourself that matter most to you.
You may want to create, but have no room to make anything your own. You may love solving problems, but have no influence over how things are done. You may care deeply about developing people, but work somewhere that gives you no opportunity to do it. You may value collaboration, quality, kindness, or integrity and continually find yourself in an environment that asks you to operate differently.
Over time, that doesn't only affect how meaningful the experience feels. It can affect who you become while you're in it.
You may become more cynical in an environment where you once brought optimism. More guarded where you would naturally be open. Less willing to offer ideas after repeatedly having them dismissed. Less engaged when there is nowhere for your effort or abilities to go.
You can be intentional about how you show up. You can direct your attention toward what is good. You can create meaning where opportunities exist.
But you cannot single-handedly turn an environment into something it isn't.
At some point, continuing to ask How can I relate to this differently? may no longer be the most useful question.
You may need to ask:
Is this environment giving me enough room to live in a way that feels meaningful to me?
Can I be the person I want to be here?
Is there somewhere else where what I have to offer could be better used?
Change doesn't have to mean immediately walking away. It might mean having a conversation, asking for a different opportunity, changing roles, setting a boundary, reducing your involvement, creating something outside of the environment, or beginning to explore what else is possible.
And sometimes, it does mean leaving.
The difference is that you're no longer changing your circumstances in the hope that somewhere else will give you meaning. You're changing them because participating fully where you are has taught you something about what you need, what matters to you, and where you have room to contribute.
Living With Intention
Most days begin without you deciding anything about how you want to experience them.
You know what you have to do. You know where you have to be. You know what needs your attention. And then the day begins, circumstances take over, and you respond to whatever happens.
Intention gives you another way to enter the day.
Instead of waiting to see how the day makes you feel, you can decide what you want to cultivate within it.
If you want to feel connected, you can look for opportunities to connect.
If you want to feel engaged, you can choose something worth investing yourself in.
If you want to feel useful, you can look for somewhere your contribution would help.
If you want to feel lighter, you can bring humour, play, or warmth into the way you interact with people.
If you want to feel proud of yourself, you can decide what would make you proud of the way you handled the day.
And intention can also be about who you want to be within the experiences you can't control.
I intend to be patient when things don't go according to plan.
I intend to be curious instead of immediately defensive.
I intend to be present with the people I'm spending time with.
I intend to be someone who notices what others contribute.
I intend to bring calm into situations that tend to pull me into urgency.
Circumstance says:
Here's the day you're having.
Intention asks:
How do you want to participate in it?
An intention doesn't guarantee that you'll feel a certain way or respond perfectly. It gives you something to return to when circumstance begins deciding for you.
Living on purpose doesn't mean every day will feel meaningful, or that you'll always show up exactly as you intended. It means recognizing that you have influence over how you experience and participate in your life.
You can direct your attention. You can create meaning where you are. You can look for opportunities to contribute. You can recognize when something needs to change. And you can decide, again and again, how you want to show up for the life in front of you.
The more intentionally you participate in your life, the more you learn about what matters to you — and the clearer your direction can become.